Saturday, July 7, 2012

When An Apple Is Not An Apple

       In a kingdom far, far away, there lived a king who was sure that he always knew better than anyone else what was best for his people. 
       "I know better than anyone else what is best for my people," said the King.
       One day, the king learned that the lowly apple actually had magical powers.
      "Sir Axel of Rod," he called out to his trusty assistant, "issue an edict to my people that each must eat an apple a day because it will keep the witches and warlocks away."
      "But Sire," replied Sir Axel, "though this may be a noble goal, I am not sure that it is within your power to issue such an edict. You see, it says right here in the Book of Majestic Powers, 'A king may command his people to eat oranges but not to eat apples.' "     
       But the king was very insistant, as kings often are, and so Sir Axel issued the edict.
       When the people heard what the king had done, they were very unhappy. Most did not like apples because the peel was always getting stuck between their teeth and because apples were very expensive in the kingdom.        
      And so, the people did the only thing they could do. They petitioned Lord John of Roberts and his band of merry Court Jesters to come to their aid.
      The Merry Jesters listened attentitively to the people explain why the king had no right to make them eat apples and then they listened to the representatives of the king explain why he did. And then they pondered.
       Finally, the Jesters announced that they had reached a verdict and that they would announce it on the last day before they were to leave for vacation and would be "outa' here" for three months beginning right after the verdict was announced.
       "A King clearly has no Apple Power," announced Lord John.
       And the people cheered.
       "However," he continued, "I have studied the apple carefully. It is round, has a sweet taste, and is red which, when combined with yellow, produces an orange color. Therefore, I have concluded that the apple is really an orange and the King does indeed have the power to compel his subjects to eat apples under the 'Orange Power'."
         As the people began filing out of the courtroom in a dejected state, the Merry Jesters suddenly stood, linked arms and began kicking their feet in the air as they sang,
         "We are the Merry Jesters. We played a joke on you. You don't have to eat an apple. Not one or three or two."
          Now, if only life would imitate art...